TL/ED – Miso
Of course, I did not understand even a bit of what was being said.
As I stood there with a question mark over my head, the librarian began explaining in an even quieter voice.
“Magic refers to the act of overlaying one’s own world of imagery upon the world called reality. This personal world is called the Inner World, and it is born at the very moment one experiences Awakening Fever.”
“I guess that must have something to do with my situation.”
“That is correct. The first Inner World any wizard opens is ordinary. How vast could the world opened by a mere ten-year-old possibly be? Because it is not much different from reality, we call it the Material Realm. The ultimate goal of a wizard who cultivates their Inner World through training is to reach the Celestial Realm. Those who reach it can perform magic freely, unrestricted by the laws of the world, and that state is commonly referred to as that of an Archmage.”
As I listened carefully to this magic lore for the first time, the librarian continued in a somewhat subdued tone.
“But sometimes, truly sometimes, during the process of cultivating one’s Inner World, one uses Forbidden Magic or receives improper teaching, and the world collapses and falls. It falls into the Deep Sea.”
“…That sounds extremely ominous.”
“Then what is so bad about it?”
“You are rejected by the world you created.”
“…”
“That alone is the only factor distinguishing the Celestial Realm from the Deep Sea, but at the same time it is everything. Because a wizard lives within the world they created, being rejected by that world is essentially a future of endless suffering and a wretched death.”
“Hmm…”
After thinking for a moment, I asked a question.
“From what you’ve said, I don’t really understand how terrible my situation actually is. Do you have an example?”
“132 years ago. A promising flame elemental wizard named Rovan Krunarf dabbled in Black Magic to summon a demon and drank its squeezed essence to cultivate his Inner World. His Inner World fell into the Deep Sea, and it became a forest where wildfires never extinguished. The first person to notice was an Academy cadet who realized his body always smelled of smoke, and when they captured him and removed his mask, his entire body was covered in blisters from severe burns. In the process of arresting him, he killed three knights and escaped. However, two months later he was found floating in a pond, dried up like black charcoal. Ironically, his cause of death was not burning but drowning. Unable to endure the pain, he had thrown himself into the pond, but his Inner World did not forgive even his corpse and burned it.”
I instantly recoiled in horror.
“I don’t think I’m at that level…”
“No wizard in history has ever fallen into the Deep Sea at birth. Therefore it is difficult to predict, but most likely the reason you are still intact is because your mind is still immature. If you become accustomed to your world and end up living more in the Deep Sea than the Material Realm as a wizard, then you will meet a similar end. Since your Inner World is the Deep Sea, you will come to know what happens to a human body in the deepest part of the ocean.”
I was more astonished at the librarian’s erudition than at the death sentence I had just heard. Do librarians at the Imperial Library have this much knowledge?
Sighing, I reconfirmed the facts.
“I get it roughly. Since my Inner World is the Deep Sea, I’ll either drown, get eaten by Deep Sea Creatures…no, before that, I’ll probably be crushed to death by water pressure.”
“Exactly.”
“Whether I learn magic or not, it’s the same?”
“Yes. The term ‘an egg submerged in water’ would be the most fitting description of your state. You cannot hatch, and even if you do, only death awaits you. And if you refuse to hatch, the result is the same.”
“…”
There’s really no answer to this.
I scratched my head, then bowed my head to the librarian in gratitude.
“It’s horrible, but…thank you for telling me my fate.”
“…I’m sorry. Perhaps it was something better left unknown.”
“I asked, so it’s fine. It’s far better than dying without knowing why.”
I picked up the book again.
“Still, at least now I know what I have to do.”
“There’s no need to make extreme choices already. At the very least, try not to leave any regrets-”
“…No, I’m not going to commit suicide. Don’t worry.”
“Then what do you intend to do?”
“Whether it’s Deep Sea Creatures, drowning, or being crushed to death by water pressure, I’ll at least try.”
I had absolutely no intention of just dying.
If this was the price of being born into a new world.
I would overcome it no matter what it took.
“First off, drowning. There’s nothing I can do about that right now, so I’ll set it aside. Water pressure. Maybe I could wear some kind of suit? And Deep Sea Creatures…what even are those? I’ve never even heard of them.”
Dersia, who had been staring at me indifferently, opened her mouth.
“Forgive me for speaking out of turn, but I will be honest with you.”
“Yes?”
“There is no way to survive in the Inner World. You will meet the worst death you can imagine. I recommend doing the things you wanted to do and then throwing yourself in. It will be far less painful.”
“Yes, it does seem that way. Of all things, I ended up with the Deep Sea. What bad luck.”
“It may be hard to accept, but it is the truth. So spending the time you have left in a meaningful way…?”
The librarian tilted her head slightly and asked.
“You do understand that?”
“I understand that no matter what I do it’s meaningless, and the end will only be a horribly painful death.”
“Is meaningless effort your goal?”
“No. It’s just unfair, isn’t it? I’m only ten, and here I am talking about dying already. Rather than giving up and living my remaining time well before I die, I’d rather struggle my whole life, succeed or not, and die pathetically.”
By reaching out for any means necessary.
Absolutely.
The librarian looked at me with mild surprise, then soon pulled out another book and began reading.
“Will you continue to visit this library in the future?”
“Mm, probably.”
“I am here at this time occasionally, so if there is anything you don’t know, please feel free to ask me. I will answer.”
“Ah…”
I brightened and bowed my head.
“Thank you.”
“Think nothing of it. May I have your name?”
“M-my name is…”
Right. She thinks I’m a noble.
I racked my brain for a plausible family name and added,
“I am Jern Rusfelt. It will be a short time, but please take care of me.”
For some reason the librarian gave me a slightly puzzled look, but surely she couldn’t have memorized all the noble family names one by one.
“Jern…I think I’m going to die from the heat…”
“Now I know how shrimp feel being grilled in a steamer…”
The scorching heat had turned even the tireless kids docile like cats.
Such is nature. I casually replied while reading a borrowed book on Magitech.
“It’s because you’re moving. If you stay still, it won’t be as hot.”
“I’m staying still and it’s still hot, okay? Aren’t you hot, Jern?”
I felt slightly puzzled at Linmel’s melting voice. I knew it was humid, but was it really that bad?
Looking around at the other children, I saw them drenched in sweat, unable to endure it, with some having already left for the well. There seemed to be a fight breaking out at the well as they waited their turn, and Linmel was already singing about how hot it was even though she had doused herself with water once.
I, wasn’t like that.
No, I wasn’t sweating a single drop.
It was definitely unnatural. Could it be connected to my Inner World…
“…Ah.”
So it is related.
When a human enters the deep sea, they are crushed to death.
If I somehow obtain a way to endure that pressure, I would still suffocate to death.
If I solved even the problem of suffocation, next I would have to survive the Deep Sea Creatures. A human who can’t even swim would be an easy prey for them.
And even if I somehow solved that…
I would die of hypothermia.
The temperature of the deep sea is not suitable for human survival.
…But I decided to think positively. Out of all the elements that could kill me, this one alone was actually helping me.
Thanks to it, I could stay cool even in this sweltering heat. As I focused again on my reading, Linmel suddenly came up and wrapped her arms around my neck.
“What, what is it?”
“Wow! What’s this? Jern, you’re kind of cool. Your skin feels like ice!”
“…”
It wasn’t that bad yet. Since my mind was still in the process of adapting to the Inner World, the penalties affecting me were almost nonexistent for now.
Even the currents only pushed me slightly, the creatures living in the deep sea barely noticed my presence, and I could breathe perfectly fine. With things like that, my body temperature probably hadn’t dropped to a level that would affect my health.
At most, it probably felt about two or three degrees cooler.
“Let’s stay together today, don’t leave me!”
I ignored Linmel’s rubbing against me with all my strength and continued reading ‘Introduction to Magitech’.
Reading didn’t change anything. I couldn’t learn magic through ordinary methods anyway.
The level of the place I was in was far too high compared to me. Like a little kid inside a spaceship created by an ultra-advanced civilization.
If the magic I could produce was supposed to be what moved that spaceship, then I couldn’t do anything. If I tried to control it recklessly, I’d only cause something terrible to happen.
But that didn’t mean I could just sit and do nothing. Starting from something like multiplication tables and trying to understand the engineering formulas that moved the spaceship might look stupid to others, but wasn’t it better than blankly accepting my fate?
And, in truth, it wasn’t as though I had achieved nothing.
I was gradually getting used to it.
“Step away, a breeze will blow soon and it’ll be cool.”
“Huh?”
I touched the current with my finger.
I still didn’t know exactly how it worked, but I thought I was beginning to understand how to apply force a little farther away, and in what way.
Unlike at first, when I could only focus it at a single point, now I could make it flow more widely over a larger area.
The current became wind. Purely because of my own lack of skill.
“Wow…how did you know? That’s amazing!”
Linmel stepped back, her eyes sparkling, and spread her arms wide to feel the breeze.
Even the other Orphanage kids, who had been listless, ran outside excitedly.
It was only wind now, but if I grew more accustomed to it, I might be able to make others outside the sea feel what I felt.
Then they too would experience the power of the deep sea.
I didn’t even know if this was magic, but if it was, my magic was utterly horrible.
I sighed, and suddenly someone grabbed my neck from behind.
As I silently reeled from the sudden assassination attempt, the “assassin” giggled and chattered.
“Still, Jern is the coolest of all!”
“…Th-thanks.”
I didn’t know whether to say it was worth the trouble of stirring the currents or not.
It was a day that left my head complicated in many ways.